“Every titleholder will have challenges – that’s what causes the growth most people notice at the end of a year. You are forced to adapt, you are forced to move onward, and you are forced to forget about the things that don’t matter so you can focus on what does.”
– Bella, IMsBB 2013
Bella is stepping down in a few days and she just shared her thoughts on Facebook. These are words I needed to hear today, from a woman who is very strong and very wonderful and I’m honored to have her as a friend and someone I admire.
Slave angie and I didn’t intend for the blog and diary to be about our year as a titleholder, but I think that’s not possible. Our involvement in the M/s titleholding and kink/leather titleholding community is something we’ve been doing for almost 4 years. International Master/slave is a major part of our lives for these 365 days. It is something that will leave a mark on us.
Today was a rough day for both of us. We were challenged in an unexpected way today and it has been very hard to process. It touches on a place that is very private and very hard for both of us to talk about because it touches at something horrible and dark and bad and places that neither slave angie or I wanted to go. We’re talking about abusive situations that we’ve each been in, as survivors. As angie said earlier today “This is not what I wanted our title year to be about.” It doesn’t have to be, but the discussion will happen and we will do what we’ve always done, pull together, align on what is important and what I/her/we stand for as Master and slave. When we’re ready, when we feel safe, when we feel it is OK for us to speak, we will. We know that we were given a job by the judges at Illinois Leather/Fetish Pride, by the judges at GLLA, by the judges at SPLF. We will do it and we will speak about it.
But now we are just going to pull together, “snuggle” as slave angie puts it, and take a deep breath. Together. And move forward. And be who we are.