More thoughts and lessons from Master/slave Conference…
“So why is it always about the chores?” slave angie asked me. We were talking about how our weeks have been going, and how the biggest discussions around the todo list in the morning, and the check-ins during the day had been going.
It was a good question, and it was one that had been on my mind lately.
Some concepts that had come up in slave Raven’s class on “Domo’s of the House” and in Laura Atoniou’s class on “Overcoming Minor Obstacles in Service Relationships” was about finding the slave skill-sets, encouraging growth and, more importantly, recognizing when something that 3 years ago had been a ya-ya, today was now just part of life, and not necessarily is going to provide the same motivation. That’s not to say those things don’t get done, but that the focus can move on. Yes, yes, you are doing the dishes today. Yes, it’s the same dishes as the previous days for the past 11 years. Wee. Not much about that which will motivate either of us.
So why was the majority of the discussion, and the measure of a “good day” about how the todo list looked?
Digging deeper, it wasn’t really about her service, it was about what I’m missing.
With the cycle of travel and presenting and doing the things that the title requires, we’ve made some sacrifices. That’s to be expected and we figured we knew what those were. However, we’re finding out what we didn’t expect or predict. The loss of time and stability to our house. The ability to have the things done.
So, between the two concepts and realizing that really, I am missing that … security, I think … that comes from having a clean and tidy house, from having the chores run on time/schedule, the security of knowing that XYZ are getting done… that’s pretty good, because knowing this is something I’m missing, and apparently needing, it means we can look at what is really needed. I think it’s grounding of some sort. I don’t know what it’s going to take, I’m still chewing on that.
The other side to this lesson is that I have some new ideas and challenges for slave angie. A re-prioritization, if you will. If our priority is the title year, then just surviving the todo list and going from event to event isn’t enough.
More to come, as we figure this out…